I recently emailed an atheist blogger with whom I've had some interaction in the past. This was because he had asked me to read Dawkins' The Selfish Gene and agreed in exchange to read one of my choosing (I chose the New Testament). I notified him that I had finished and inquired after an update. He responded that he had not had time partly because his father is near death. I told him I would pray for him and his father, and he then asked me not to, asked me if I would be pleased if a Santeria were to sacrifice an animal in his religious ritual or a Muslim were to pray for me, were I in a similar situation. My response follows:
Hey _____,
I hope you'll be assured that I don't engage in this to rub any salt in a wound. I cannot empathise with the death of a parent (yet), though I have lost an unborn child which has caused me a great deal of grief. And my wife lost her father some time ago.
At any rate, this seems to be an instructive topic. You continue to act inconsistently with your stated worldview, where you have said explicitly and specifically that any moral stance you may have is nothing more than personal preference, yet you're trying to impose that on me.
That's indeed why it's important to flesh this out.
Now, in my case with the Santeria followers or the Muslim, I know that their religion is false and that such idolatry brings further condemnation on them. For THEIR sake I don't want them to do that for me or in my name, b/c that action is concretely, objectively wrong. So it makes sense to request such a thing not be done in my worldview.
It doesn't make sense in yours. In refusing to honor your request, I'm just acting consistently with your own worldview in my refusal to be constrained by what someone else thinks is right. What your father thinks should be respected makes no difference - it's neither right nor wrong to respect another person's views on any issue. I prefer to pray, so it's right for me. That's what you yourself have said. I point out that you apparently can't live out what you said you believe. That would give me pause. I hope and pray it does you as well.
Now, I'd urge you to consider just for a second why these 'vultures' are appealing to your father. I don't know what they're saying, but I know what I'd say. Sthg like this:
"Sir, the day when you will stand before Jesus to account for what you've done is close at hand, very probably; I think we're both being realistic to say that death is near. Please take this opportunity, now, to repent of your sins and ask Jesus to forgive you. He will forgive you now, but He will not when you have passed on. He is gracious, but seize the opportunity. Today is the day of salvation. Confess that you are a sinner, please. Be saved."
My concern is for HIS soul; I want to praise and worship the Lord Jesus forever and ever someday and I want him (and you) by my side while doing it. I don't want either of you to bear your own sin before the judgment of a holy God.
Given that my (hypothetical) concerns are wholly altruistic and that I'm spending my time communicating this message that I could be using to earn money or give my wife a foot massage, I don't know if calling me a 'vulture' is even remotely appropriate. Of course, I don't know all the details of what's happening with your father, but perhaps I guessed correctly.
Peace,
Rhology